Friday, May 28, 2010

It's a Paperwork World


I thought this blog was getting a bit visually dull so I figured I'd add a pic of some of my favorite flowers..Black Eyed Susans. Aside from the obvious I like them because they grow wild, don't need to be cultivated and usually show up in unexpected places to bring a smile to someone's face.
I got more paper work to fill out in the mail today this time from the oncologist's office. Funny they ask the same questions as every other office I've been to in the past month or so. HIPPA not withstanding couldn't I just sign something that would let them send the vital information about how my grandmother died and what I'm allergic to? It's gotten so bad that I've begun carrying a list of the medications I take and their dosages in my purse, oh you need that info? I have it right here. My fear is that someday I'm going to get pulled over for speeding and I'm going to give him my license, registration and medication list.
So far I've given all of these people alot more information than they've given me, including tissue samples. I've never been a patient person and this test, wait, see another Dr. thing is slowly making me crazier than usual. Sometimes I feel like it's some kind of medical pass the buck and at the end I'm going to be sent to see some poor soul in the basement of the medical arts building who's only job is to deliver news that people don't want to hear. This person will be behind bulletproof glass of course and the information won't be quite clear because the microphone from the booth will have some static so it will end up something like this " Ms. Kirkegaard, your tests are all in and they show that your tumor is &^%$^*&^-malignant" then the shade goes down over the booth and you're left standing there thinking ( you may be yelling) What?? malignant or not? "come on I need to know! That's when a piece pf paper comes out of the booth like those fortune teller machines at the arcade when we were kids that says " Your next appointment is with Dr.Nextinline in a month, have a nice day."

Wednesday, May 26, 2010

What's the rush?

I just got a call about my oncologist's office, appointment, June 11....apparently time is not of the essence to anyone but me and my family and friends. Although, considering there is only one oncologist in Watertown this could be a rushed appointment. The first thing that ran through my cup half empty(dominant personality) mind was " maybe there's nothing they think they can do anyway so why rush" then the cup half full (submissive personality) said " well maybe there's no rush because it's not as bad as all that " Or maybe and most likely, he's the only Dr. in town and he's booked solid. Still, the waiting is no fun. On a lighter note, the folks I work with all got together and gave me a gift certificate for a one hour massage, I've never had a massage but it sounds wonderful to me. Maybe she can work out some of the kinks that I know are caused by stress. It's not comfortable to walk around with your shoulders up around your ears all day, trust me I know this because it's what I do when I get stressed. Chris, Jenny and the baby are coming up tonight for dinner, seeing that baby always makes everything OK for awhile at least.

The Results are In

So the test results are in and yes I do have cancer. Unfortunately I don't have a whole lot of other information at this point because I haven't seen the oncologist yet, the pulmonologist gave me the biopsy results and then basically said I'd have to wait til I saw the oncologist to find out the extent and prognosis. I know it is small cell cancer which if you were going to pick a cancer from the drop down menu of such things would and should not be your (or my) choice. So now I just have to pray that it is localized and hasn't send any mean little cancer cells to other parts of my body besides my mediasteinum (between my lungs). I'm sure once I talk to the local Dr. I'll be wanting at least a second opinion as to treatment and then we'll start the battle.

I figured I'd start a blog because I can get information out to anyone who's interested quickly and maybe along the line I can learn and share with others.

So, that's where we are on May 26, 2010.

Thanks to all of you who have send good wishes and prayers along this part of the journey, keep them coming, I can feel the good vibrations and they feel good.