As Time Goes By

My dear friend Diane passed away on Sunday. It seems like just yesterday that we were freshmen room mates at Luther College , our first time away from home, trying to act brave and "cool". Who'd have thought that September day over 30 years ago would lead me to this September day. I will miss her, there are memories that only we shared like our madcap trip across country to attend college in Nebraska, and twisting pretzles on a hot summer afternoon in Kutztown, PA. These things seem so long ago and yet not. Rest well my friend.
I found out this week that my radiation treatments will be done next week. I only have 6 to go and then maybe my body can start to heal and I can get closer to the long wanted bacon cheeseburger. This may sound crazy but I'm going to miss going there everyday. It's been a place of security, where folks knew what I was going through and were there to help if I needed it. I think I'm going to feel a bit abandoned for awhile. It won't be long though and I'll be back talking about what we do next. Preventative measures will start in a couple of months.
I'm hoping to go back to work soon too, it'll be good to replace one routine with another and this routine is definately less frightening. My only concern is that I still get so tired very quickly but I'll only be working part time and once I get on a schedule that should help alot.
My grandson is going to be baptized this Sunday, the kids are doing it here in the church that Chris grew up in across that street from our house. Wow I remember taking him to Sunday school when he was just a tot and now Rex will be part of that church family.
Many people have told me that think I should publish this blog. I would like to, with added comments as I look back. I have no clue about publishing except for self publishing and I think this would be too big a project for that. I want to share these thoughts with folks who are going through the same thing and also with the people around them. I've found comfort in sharing my thoughts and I hope I can help others. So if any of you know anyone who knows something about publishing or who might send me in the right direction please let me know. I know the story isn't over but I'd like to get a start on putting it together.

It's a Paperwork World

I thought this blog was getting a bit visually dull so I figured I'd add a pic of some of my favorite flowers..Black Eyed Susans. Aside from the obvious I like them because they grow wild, don't need to be cultivated and usually show up in unexpected places to bring a smile to someone's face.

I got more paper work to fill out in the mail today this time from the oncologist's office. Funny they ask the same questions as every other office I've been to in the past month or so. HIPPA not withstanding couldn't I just sign something that would let them send the vital information about how my grandmother died and what I'm allergic to? It's gotten so bad that I've begun carrying a list of the medications I take and their dosages in my purse, oh you need that info? I have it right here. My fear is that someday I'm going to get pulled over for speeding and I'm going to give him my license, registration and medication list.

So far I've given all of these people alot more information than they've given me, including tissue samples. I've never been a patient person and this test, wait, see another Dr. thing is slowly making me crazier than usual. Sometimes I feel like it's some kind of medical pass the buck and at the end I'm going to be sent to see some poor soul in the basement of the medical arts building who's only job is to deliver news that people don't want to hear. This person will be behind bulletproof glass of course and the information won't be quite clear because the microphone from the booth will have some static so it will end up something like this " Ms. Kirkegaard, your tests are all in and they show that your tumor is &^%$^*&^-malignant" then the shade goes down over the booth and you're left standing there thinking ( you may be yelling) What?? malignant or not? "come on I need to know! That's when a piece pf paper comes out of the booth like those fortune teller machines at the arcade when we were kids that says " Your next appointment is with Dr.Nextinline in a month, have a nice day."